work 101

i've just started a new job and normally i don't reeeally care too much about what i wear, i just wear what makes me happy. (as the sub-title declares, i love clothes, but brands and junk don't affect me too much) anyway, back to the job. i don't own work clothes; i own "church" clothes, but my job title is "runner" so i don't need to look that dressy, just enough to be presentable when i go on errands/ serve subpoenas (<--- AWESOMENESS). this has turned out to be a greater undertaking than i had previously expected. people don't make clothes for the "in between". they make dressy suits, and they make cute casual, but i can't go running around in a flannel button-up and skinny jeans and my wonderful flip flops. clearly you can see what my desired wardrobe is. also, home girl specifically shopped at 5 different places (t.j. maxx., francescas, j. crew, target, forever 21) for a brown skirt. just a simple brown skirt. a waist-tie belt would be a nice touch, but i don't need too much. i know i'm a beggar in this area; dear hateful earth, you provided me with nothing. well that's not entirely true. i found one that made me look like i was leftover from soviet russia. it is not advisable to look like you support communism at a new job. also, when i think about the old soviet russia, i picture the women in head to toe khaki, and not having any part of their body showing, besides the hands-- which would most likely have gloves covering them-- and their faces. I know most of them aren't muslim, so i'm not concerned about offending them on that point. and since i canNOT  wear a floor length skirt without looking retarded, or like a 4 year-old at the christian girl scout day camp, i absolutely tried on the mini, and you know i would have been the soviet whore. also not O.K..

there i am shopping. and today in one of the stores i decided to test my wardrobe fate, i found a super adorable skirt (fig. 1)

fig. 1 (let's pretend my legs are that lean)

i'm with jennana, who is HOOOOMEEE!!, and i of course have a small fashion show. one dress i put on, looks like something marshall, how i met your mother, would wear as his night shirt. it was horrendous. and ginormous. so then i put on fig.1 and said, "you must stay on my body because you are precious". so, naturally i walked out, asked the girl if i could leave with the clothes on and put my old clothes in the shopping bag. she laughed and said yes. well i was in a predicament because the shirt i had on was see through, but before i found fig.1 i had on a sheath over the otherwise scandalous top. had to get a cami... this little blue skirt made me happy to have something new, but cost me a pretty penny.

back to work clothes. i've been doing an absurd amount of online therapy trying to find things to wear. i have a plethora of comfortable clothing; i stocked up on jeans over the break, biting me in the butt now. however, i realized swiftly that i have lots of tiny dresses and only one skirt that i can wear and be comfortable in. oh. no. tiny and picking up boxes and micro managing a place that, let's be honest, is in need of a meticulous clara, where ever she is, do not go well together. skirts and pants are almost exclusively the way to go. unless i want to be unique and wear some volleyball spandex under my dresses. i think that might be more scandalous than people seeing my undies... they're basically the same thing. we'll find out.

since the shopping excursion started i've come out with 2 skirts, 4 tops, 2 belts, a new wallet (what? i needed something to pay homage to my bank account...), and a depleted bank account. i'll have to continue this shopping spree later, like when i get my next paycheck. so far job, you're costing me money to work. that better change soon, or you better start giving me some change (heyoo, punny)